If you’ve ever wondered how to start strap-on play, you’re not alone. Many people are curious but unsure where to begin, what gear works best, or how to keep things safe. This guide gives you clear steps, honest advice, and local pointers so you can enjoy the experience without any guesswork.
First thing’s first: pick a strap‑on that feels comfortable for both partners. Most beginners start with a basic silicone dildo and a sturdy harness. Silicone is body‑safe, easy to clean, and provides a realistic feel. When shopping, check the diameter – 3‑4 inches is a common sweet spot for most couples. If you’re unsure about size, many London adult shops let you feel the product beforehand, or you can order a small starter kit online and test it in the privacy of your home.
The harness matters as much as the dildo. Find one with adjustable straps and a wide, padded base. This prevents shifting during play and reduces pressure on the wearer’s hips. Look for a harness that’s easy to put on and take off – you’ll thank yourself when the mood is already hot and you don’t waste time fumbling with straps.
Before any action, have an open chat with your partner. Talk about what you each want, any hard limits, and how you’ll signal if things get too intense. A simple “stop” word or a pre‑arranged hand signal works well, especially if you’re using a blindfold or other sensory play.
It’s also smart to set a time limit for the first session. A 20‑minute run‑through lets you discover what feels good without over‑committing. Afterward, spend a few minutes debriefing – what worked, what didn’t, and what you’d tweak next time. This feedback loop builds trust and makes future sessions smoother.
If you’re new to BDSM dynamics, consider reading a short cheat‑sheet on “safe, sane, and consensual” principles. It doesn’t have to be a heavy textbook; a quick blog post or video can cover the basics and keep the experience positive.
London offers several discreet venues where you can explore strap‑on play without feeling exposed. Private rooms in reputable adult clubs, like Club Luxe in Soho, provide a clean, secure environment with staff trained in consent practices. If you prefer something more low‑key, many boutique hotels offer “by‑the‑hour” rooms that are perfect for a private session.
For those who enjoy a bit of role‑play, themed parties at underground venues can add excitement. Look for events labeled “BDSM Night” or “Kink Social” on local community boards. Always verify the venue’s safety policies and opt for spaces with clear emergency exits and on‑site medical kits.
Finally, you don’t need to leave home to have a great time. Setting the mood with soft lighting, a curated playlist, and some scented candles can turn a bedroom into a private playground. Invest in a good quality latex or leather sheet to protect the floor and make cleanup easier.
Remember, the best strap‑on experience comes from preparation, honest conversation, and a willingness to experiment. Whether you’re stepping into a club in Shoreditch or keeping it cozy at home, the key is to stay safe, stay respectful, and have fun.